it's time for a little game i just made up called, "guess lauren and eric's age?"

this weekend, eric and i packed up the pooches and headed to ohio to visit my family for the weekend (hence the lack of posting).

the trip back was such a relaxing time for me to just be able to enjoy the company of my husband.  it consisted of the following:

1.  eric's old-man cardigan with suede patches on the shoulders and elbows, which i happen to love on him.

2.  me knitting.  eric chuckled when he asked me what i was making and i responded, "what do you think i'm making?  i only know squares and rectangles."  but you know what?  i make squares and rectangles like a champ.

3.  listening to garrison keillor's a prairie home companion on NPR.
























...and i totally understand and won't be offended at all if you guess 65.

i was feeling quite studious today, so this is me...exercising my brain.  (please don't let them ask me what book that is)

just perusing the bookshelves for a good find.  maybe i should revisit ACSM's guidelines for fitness testing and prescription, you know, brush up on the old college bank of knowledge

i really need a pair of glasses.  dang you 20/20 vision.

this picture is actually very deceptive.  it doesn't even come close to doing the height difference justice.  at the beginning of each year, we meet up with my mother-in-law's side of the family at pokagon state park in angola, indiana.  this was my third year, and every year that i've been part of this tradition, at least one person will approach the family and ask if they are a sports team or point out how extraordinarily tall they are.  i love this family, but when we leave them, my neck breathes a sigh of relief.  if you would like a better glimpse into the lives of the tall women in this family, you should visit my wonderful sister-in-law's blog.

where was i?  oh, yes, poof love.  i had some free time tonight and decided to make myself a little something pretty.  introducing my newest poof:

don't mind the robe.  comfort is a prerequisite to a creative crafting mind and nimble fingers.  this isn't made up, it's a scientific fact.

wow, that was random and altogether unorganized.  thank goodness tomorrow is friday, y'all.

seriously.

the tree came down today, and the last of the presents found a proper home.

christmas lists have been traded in for new year's resolutions.

today is a time for reflection, and tomorrow is a time for new beginning.

there is something absolutely magical about this day, and my day truly summed up my 2010 experience.  i started it off with breakfast in bed.  the hubs made me eggs, toast and coffee (swoon).  the love that i have experienced from him this year has been more than i could have ever hoped for from someone.  wedding events and honeymooning were wonderful to us in 2009, but 2010 was the year that really solidified this whole marriage thing for us.  we finally met some days that tested us, which was a new experience as everything prior to that had been roses.  but you know what?  we still haven't had a real fight.  i think that speaks volumes of our communication and willingness to swallow our pride.  but even more than that, i think it speaks so highly of the ways that God works when you allow him to take the reigns.

today was also mind-boggling crazy.  there was a huge to-do list and not everything ended up getting checked off.  i have felt so often this year that i just fill and fill my time.  i started my first full-time job at the end of last year, so this is still fairly new to me.  on top of that, i have begun to go deeper with my leadership in young life, spending more time with girls outside of our weekly club meetings, and also taking on a small group on sunday nights.  i trained for three races this year, and as if all of this wasn't enough, got a new puppy and started a blog.  somehow it all just works, although nothing seems to ever get crossed off the to-do list, at least as far as my house is concerned.

2010 has really been a year of discovering myself.  i have explored my passions, my heart and my faith.  i have been tested in ways that i would have never imagined were possible and discovered both creativity and strength that i never knew i had.  heading into 2011, the sky is the limit.  my new year's resolution for 2010?  to run at least a half marathon.  what i accomplished?  two half marathons and a full marathon in which i raised $2900 for the Leukemia & Lymphoma Society.  take that, 2010.

watch out 2011, because i'm about to blow your mind.  especially with these three in my life.  as long as i've got their love, nothing can hold me back:

please don't laugh at what i'm about to tell you.  promise?

okay, here goes.

i believed in santa until sixth grade.  and i fully believed that he lived next door to my great grandma.  this guy had a full white beard and a jolly belly and was just generally awesome.  i used to tell him what i wanted for christmas while he raked his yard in the fall.

i believe i was in third grade when my grandpa and i were spending some time together and he revealed to me that he would be dressing up as santa for our extended-family christmas gathering.  he asked me to keep it a secret.  i was so excited to have such exclusive insider information.  i mean, my grandpa was going to be playing the big guy, and none of my cousins were going to know!  that's power.  so when i spilled the beans to them, i immediately felt overwhelmed with guilt that ate away at me. 

and when it came time for santa's visit, i could tell it wasn't my grandpa behind the beard.  still, thinking about it now, i feel awful for taking that year away from him.  he wanted to keep the experience magical for the younger grandkids, so he found a stand-in.

it was after that year that i realized this wasn't the first time my grandpa was going to be the guy in red.  i began to look at pictures from years past and recognized those eyes.  and then i realized my grandpa had always, amazingly, managed to be off somewhere doing something else when santa came to visit us.  he always managed to miss santa, and now i understood why.

but you know what?  the magic wasn't lost for me knowing that the real santa never came to visit us personally.  in fact, there is so much more magic in the memories that i carry of my grandpa in this role than any real santa would have ever provided. 

so here's to my santa, whom i still very much believe in and miss with all of my heart.  the magical part of you will live on in me until i'm old and gray.



this picture doesn't need editing.  it's perfect just the way it is, in all of its 1986 glory.



i am 24 years old.  i am a wife and a homeowner.  i already have a bachelor degree in exercise science.  by all accounts, i guess that makes me a grownup.  so why is it that i still struggle with what i want to do "when i grow up"?

i'll be honest, if i hadn't fallen in love with eric and moved to fort wayne, this probably wouldn't be an issue for me.  if not for him, i would likely be in chicago right now, continuing to do what i became passionate about during my internship in the city in 2008.  i would have my personal training certification by now and likely a list of clients that i would be helping to shape into healthier, happier individuals.  i would have my own spin class, where i could drip with sweat and yell out fun affirmations like, "you can do it!  only 10 more seconds until the top of this hill!  push through it!"  at this point in the year, we would be in the midst of a huge football-themed incentive program, and teams would be battling it out as the season draws near the end.  i would see co-workers become more competitive than you can imagine, showing up at the fitness center before work, at lunch, and after work, not even for the prize-in-store, but more for their sense of pride.  who knows, i might even be totally ripped by now (ha!).

i worked at big red...

...and this was my stage.  i miss my stage.

side note:  on the other hand, i wouldn't have the love of my life, wouldn't have found Young Life, definitely wouldn't have two dogs and probably wouldn't have felt a push to discover other passions in my life like crafting and blogging.  can you imagine?!

i loved the corporate fitness world and the sense of community built amongst co-workers.  i loved the relationships i built and guiding individuals that didn't feel like they could reach their health and fitness goals on their own.  unfortunately, there isn't really a market for corporate fitness in fort wayne, so i took on a job as a receptionist at a law office.  the job has its perks, including the same hours as eric, weekends off, and an opportunity to work with three of my close friends.  however, it's no secret that this is not what i want to do for the rest of my life.  collection law is not where my heart is.  i have too many passions in this life to spend the majority of my day doing something i don't love.

and so, the search is on, and the sky is the limit (literally - i've thought in the past that i would love to be a pilot).  i love taking pictures, so maybe i should learn the ins and outs of photography.  i know a ton about bridal fashion and love following the different designers; maybe i should work at a bridal salon or even open my own.  i really enjoy crafting and blogging, and omgosh, i've seen listings for professional bloggers.  you can get paid a salary for this???  i also really happen to love, with my whole heart, working with high school kids through Young Life and wish that i could do it all the time.  what would a job in youth ministry look like for me?

the most serious plan i've been able to come up with is this:  after having children, i would be a stay-at-home, but would teach group exercise and potentially do some personal training on the side.  i would also go back to school to get my teaching degree so that, by the time our children started school, i would hopefully be able to find a job as a high school math teacher (did i mention i think i'm some kind of weirdo that's both right- and left-brained?). 

as you can see, i'm a bit all-over-the-map.  but as far as i'm concerned, i would rather spend the rest of my life trying to pursue my passions and figure this thing out than come to the end of it and wonder why i settled. 

life is too short, folks.  what are you doing to pursue what you love?

this is a post that i've been avoiding for a while.  how on earth can i possibly capture the best day of my life to date in a few words?  i'm not really sure, but i think it's time i try.

waking up felt like christmas, except 23947 times better.  you know how every other day of the year is a struggle to get out of bed?  or is that just me?  but then christmas rolls around and the second you start to come to, you remember what day it is and immediately jump up, bright-eyed and bushy-tailed, ready to go.  or is that just me too?

one of the things that i remember most about our wedding day is the overall sense of calm i felt leading up to the ceremony.  even when my sister-in-law's dress managed to pick up some gum from the church parking lot and the hem of my dress ripped, leading to some last-minute repairs.  i didn't even have to will myself to be calm.  it just happened naturally, and i was so thankful for that.


the black ring was my something borrowed and was the first piece of jewelry my grandpa ever gave my grandma




priceless.


i will never forget the look on eric's face when i walked down the aisle.  i love our family and friends, but as far as my memory is concerned, he may as well have been the only one there.



i also will never forget how long the song that my aunt sang for us seemed to be, simply because it was between the time that we lit the unity candle and when we were pronounced as husband and wife and finally got to kiss each other.


michelle featherstone - we are man and wife.  beautiful.

it's amazing to me how the most memories from the day are wrapped up in the 30 minute ceremony.  before and after that is pretty much a blur, but those 30 minutes will forever hold a place in my memory for the weight that it holds; when we got to declare our love for each other in front of God and all of the people that we love most.


then we had a greeting line (i wish i had known how long those things take...whew!), took some pictures and were an hour late to our reception.  i'm sure that was a pain in the butt for some, but we were married, so i didn't sweat it.  the food was great, the dj was wonderful, and the company wasn't so bad either.









we danced to all of the wedding favorites and at one point, a dance-off took place between the funniest four-year-old i've ever met and one of my besties' husband.  sadly, this also didn't get captured on video.  obviously if i could do it over again, i would hire a videographer.




when i look back at our wedding, it's not the fact that we didn't hire a videographer or the little snags that stand out to me.  because at the end of the day, i was married to my best friend, the most wonderful man i have ever and will ever know. 

and that made it a perfect day.

our children will obviously be very blond.  and fair-skinned.

neebish island is located between the upper peninsula in michigan and ontario, canada, in the st. marys river, which flows from lake superior down into lake huron.  eric's uncle owns a house up there, which was once his grandpa's, and they have been visiting the island for eric's whole life.

 
eric's family goes up to neebish island for thanksgiving every other year.  two years ago, while eric and i were still dating, i was lucky enough to be invited along for the first time to join all of them.  it was that week that i absolutely fell in love with the place.  i mean, how could you not?  check out this view:

our little tree from two years ago




perfect.

with marriage, there comes a challenge of trying to blend traditions and create new ones.  there have been some that have been tough for me to give up and some new ones that have taken some getting used to.  this one, though, has been such a blessing.  being on an island without many ammenities, there are no stores for black friday shopping, no internet, no cable.  what is there?  absolutely amazing quality time with people i love.  eric and i went up to neebish again with some friends this summer and reconnected in a way that is so difficult to do otherwise with all of the distractions that constantly surround us.

today was a much-needed day.  do you ever get so caught up in the things that are going on in your life that you don't even realize how far out of touch you've become with those you're closest with?  i definitely got to that point recently with my best friend, who also happens to be my cousin, falynne.  well, last week she called me out on this fact, and i'm glad she did.  i didn't realize until i was forced to stop and think about it that i hadn't seen her in four months.  and the last two times i've seen her, it's been in a party setting with almost no one-on-one time.  this is a long way from college days when i used to randomly make the 45 minute drive to her old place to hang out and make let her feed and entertain me.

so today i made the now two-hour drive and we got some quality time in.  we went to a craft show (i know, this is becoming a theme in my life), we had lunch, we caught up.  and at the end of the day, i was sad to leave.  although we are such completely different people, there's something about our friendship that just works.

oh, and not to mention her little boy owen is so cute and fun and just at the absolute perfect age.  he is still a little clumsy on his feet, which is precious to watch, but he is also starting to comprehend so much; when falynne asks if she can put his shoes on, he backs up to her and plops on the floor, he knows all of his books that have kitties in them, and at times, you can just see the wheels turning when you look at him.

let me be perfectly honest here:  my husband is a nerd.  i see absolutely no fault in this.  in fact, i love him in all of his quirky glory.  but lets face it, there are things that i have been introduced to in my life with eric that i would have never come across on my own and there are certain things i've had to learn to embrace:

• i am now very aware of the importance of a kill ratio.  i would maybe be interested in learning to play call of duty so we could play together, but i don't want to mess up this ever-important statistic of his.
• when eric described the firefly tv series to me as a "western set in space" i have to admit, i was more than a bit skeptical.  now i have not only watched the whole series, but i'm definitely a fan.  i love nathan fillion's raw wit and although i don't understand why every nerdy guy is obsessed with summer glau, at least i know who she is now.
• one word: rifftrax
• star wars:  no, i didn't love them, but yes, i watched them all.
• when we went to a high school volleyball game a couple weeks back and someone shouted, "yah 62!" eric yelled out, "what about beef stew?"  the highschoolers looked at him like he was such a dork.  i chuckled.
• yes, this is my husband cheesing in a transformers t-shirt.  and yes, i bought it for him:

ohholycow...this was only two years ago and he's got such a baby face!

nerdy tendencies i'm a little more resistent to:

• star trek - okay, i loved the new one, and as long as they continue to make them, i'll go see them.  but the old ones?  hubs got it wrong when he started me out with a next generation movie.  i don't care if the william shatner ones are much better, because i've been so turned off to them by the ones with the bald guy, and levar burton?  that guy peaked with reading rainbow.  seriously.

more of this, please... (source)

...and less of this, mmmmkay? thanks (source)

•  world of warcraft (aka WoW):  wow is right.  he doesn't play anymore, but he definitely did in college.  i'm sorry, but, "i'm a level 19 hunter" doesn't exactly impress me, especially since i actually just pulled that out of nowhere and while it sounds legit, it may not be a real part of the game.  regardless, i cannot be convinced that RPGs (role-playing games, for those of you lacking in nerd-speak) are a cool thing.
• monty python:  i know that these guys are supposed to be funny, but i'm afraid their humor is a bit lost on me.  and i love stupid humor.  maybe it's because i just suck at understanding people with accents.

i wonder what eric has had to embrace about me.  quite possibly the fact that i will be dressing up as luna lovegood for the midnight premier of harry potter in ohhh...approximately 1 week, 2 days and 10 hours.  weeeeeee!

what can i say?  i guess it's nerd love.

 


today i stepped out, sold some of my crafts and ended up spending more money than i made.

sometimes when i really step back and think about it, our relationship with our dogs might not be normal.

since the day we brought lily home, eric has referred to me as mommy, and i to him as daddy.  if i say to her, "where's daddy?" she will run straight to him, but "where's eric?" would just lead to a blank stare.  and if i ask titan anything, he just cocks his head to the side and looks confused.  you'll get there, buddy.  it just takes time.

when people talk about their children, i find myself relating to them with stories about our dogs.  seriously, lauren, people don't want to hear that their children are like dogs.

eric and i lovingly refer to lily as our little "turd muffin" and titan as our "poopsicle".  i have no idea how or why this started, but it's the picture of mature parenting.  i can only imagine the names we'll come up with for our kids someday.

and my ultimate low as a puppy-mama:  two weekends ago, eric and i stayed in to watch a movie.  at one point, i looked over and saw titan and lily sleeping on their huge dog bed (seriously, this thing takes up about a quarter of our living room).  they looked quite content and i decided to join them for some snuggle time.  i ended up falling asleep, and when i woke up, eric and the dogs were gone, it was 7 am, and i had slept all night on a dog bed.  oy vey...

but seriously, who wouldn't want to snuggle up to these monsters?

on a side note, for more of titan and lily's story, i've created a page just for them.